Shaken Not Stirred

Posted on Fri Oct 6th, 2023 @ 6:27pm by Cadet Senior Grade Riaothren(Ren) ch'Shaorhs & Cadet Junior Grade Noxi Harrison

2,220 words; about a 11 minute read

Mission: **ARCHIVED** 1 - Cruising through the galaxy
Location: Counselling Office
Timeline: 3 months prior to Assignment Day- 1 day after Lean On Me

Ren woke up disoriented, not knowing where he was, just knowing he felt like a shuttle had landed on top of his antennae and a band of Vulcans were pacing inside his head.

Then he remembered what had happened the night before. Most of it anyway. He remembered Jason's words and how they had made him feel. He'd never forget that as long as he lived. He remembered going to see his friend Dave and being offered a drink. After that point, everything was kind of hazy.

He felt a bit nauseous when he stood up but managed to get to the replicator and get himself some water without throwing up. He folded the blanket up neatly and put it on the couch. Not wanting to wake Dave, he quietly left the room and headed to the Counseling office.

He stumbled a little when he stepped inside.


Noxi was already in the office-she always was when she was "on duty." She was a bit of an overachiever, and while she made friends easily, she was also focused on getting the best assignment after the Cadet cruise.

"Ren! Are you ok?" Luckily for him, she was standing near the door, at the bookshelf, filing away some things for the Doctor on duty. She steadied him by taking his arm. "Do you need me to call Medical?"

"No, I'm fine. Well, not fine, but please don't call Medical. I just tripped. Clumsy of me I know, but just an accident."

"I got drunk last night and wound up crashing in Dave Holloway's room. I have a really, really bad headache."

"You remember last week I told you I had a boyfriend? Someone I cared about? Someone I, that I loved? Someone I thought loved me?"

"I guess it wasn't as mutual as I thought. He dumped me last night."

Noxi nodded. "Heartbreak always sucks," she said. She handed him a cup of tea. "Drink that. Let's go into a room, and we can talk there privately," she said, leading him into a treatment room. "Tell me what happened."

Ren took the tea and sipped tentatively. "Thanks," he said before following her back.

"So, yesterday I got a message from him on my PADD. I had a feeling then that something was up because that is not something he usually did. But he did say to meet him at Harvey'swhich was where we had our first date. So, I thought maybe everything was alright and he had something romantic planned."

"I met him there and I could tell when I saw his face that something bad was happening. That's when he did it. Told me it was over, because of his duty to the crown."

Noxi nodded again. She really needed to find a new thing. "I see. That's really sucky, and I am sorry. Duty to the crown? That seems kind of like a bullshit excuse if you'll excuse my language," she said. She'd heard worse from guys she'd dated, though, so who was she to judge? "How are you dealing with it? Just know it's not YOUR fault, so try not to beat yourself up," she said.

" I have to be honest, I'm not dealing with it well, I mean, I can't remember the last time I got drunk. I mean I go to parties here and there, and I like to drink, but not get drunk."

"And I get what you're saying about it being a bullshit excuse and I kind of feel the same way. I mean I could tell it wasn't easy for him. He was crying, we both were. I want to give him the benefit of the doubt, but it's really hard. It still hurts so much. I don't know what to do."

Noxi nodded. "Of course, it hurts. It's a betrayal of sorts. What we can do is either talk it out, or I can give you a hypospray and let you sleep it off. Sometimes, it just takes TIME to heal, unfortunately," she said. "And drinking to numb the pain is understandable. Are you ok, though? Hangover?" She asked. "I know I am a straight woman, but what I do when I've been broken up with is eat a lot, cry, listen to music, and call my parents. They're usually pretty good at telling me that I am perfect, it's his loss, etc. I know you don't have your close father figure, but is there anyone in your life like that? Sometimes, hearing it helps," she suggested. "In the meantime, let's do an exercise. Picture a stoplight, in your mind. Like the ones we used to have on Earth? Have you seen one? Anyway. If the relationship was a stoplight, what color would it be?"

"I do have a close father figure, or maybe favorite uncle. Jon Anderson. He took me under his wing when I was on the . He was my guardian there and helped me through a lot of things. I could call him up. And there's Dave Holloway, my best friend here at the Academy. I already talked with him. I crashed at his place last night."

"And yes, I have a hell of a hangover. I feel like the Imperial Gurard is marching around inside my head."

"Right now that stoplight would be red. We're over and done with no matter how much I might want to get back together again, he's made it clear he's not interested in that. Why do you ask?"

Noxi explained. "Then that's what I mean. The stoplight is to represent your choices. If you're seeing that it's red, then it's truly over, and you can work on moving past it. If it were green or yellow, I'd take you in a different direction," she said. "I'll get you more water," she said, standing up to cross to the replicator. A moment later, she returned, handing him the cup. "Call your uncle. I am sure he will also have some good advice elders have had heartbreak and they know," she said. "And rely on your friend Dave. And me, and Ki'ana, and whoever else. Just like sharing your joy helps to process it, same thing with pain," she said. "If you'd like, I can ask Dr. Baxter to allow me to administer a hypospray for your hangover," she said. "Us Counselors aren't doctors but we DO use medications sometimes," she said. "While you're deciding, tell me. Did you see ANY signs at all?" She asked. That would help her to determine if he ignored red flags, and if so, what he could fix for the next time.

"I don't have to think about it. Getting a hypospray I mean. If he'll allow it I'll take it. I'm really regretting drinking so much."

"As for Jason, I'd been expecting something. Not this. But something for a while. He became distant, pensive. I don't know just different."

His antennae dipped forward. The other day we were in the quad and a good looking guy walked by. I looked. Just for a moment. I didn't stare, I didn't comment, I just looked and then I looked back at him. Normally he'd jump down my throat about it. But not in a serious jealous kind of way. More like a funny, I caught you kind of thing. Then we'd laugh about it He didn't even notice, or if he did, he pretended not to."

"The sex lately has been practically non-existent and he's been..." Ren searched for the right word as his face grew a deeper shade of blue. "Passive. Not passive position-wise, we took turns at that. But passive as in nonresponsive. Like it wasn't enough. I wasn't enough."

Noxi nodded. She held up a finger for him to stop for a moment. She tapped the comms badge they wore. =/\=Dr. Baxter, as soon as you can, may I have the hypospray that helps with hangovers? One of my patients is a bit ill today.=/\= The man didn't blink once, Noxi was responsible about that kind of thing, and he was used to Cadets getting in over their heads. He confirmed that he could when their session was over.

"See? There you go, not a problem. He actually reminds me a bit of my father but kind and forgiving. Never judgmental. Just shakes his head and allows us to be ourselves. He's really great, and I am sad that he won't be coming along as a cruise advisor," she said. "Now, back to Jason. His reticence indicates that he may have known earlier that he was going to have to say something. Which is neither here nor there-it sucks that, if he did, he didn't say something sooner. It could've just been that he SUSPECTED it, and was trying to figure out how and when to tell you," she said. "I wouldn't know unless I talked to him directly, but that's not necessary. And the sex waning down is also a tell-tale sign- doesn't matter one's gender or orientation, sex IS an important aspect of romantic relationships, and you're correct to recognize it as a red flag," she said. "Though, don't blame yourself. I can't say from experience, obviously, that you are a good...partner, but I'd trust that you are. If you weren't, I would doubt anyone would have much to do with you," she said. She was choosing her words carefully-they were both adults, but still. "I know that I wouldn't necessarily put stock in a romance if the sex was bad," she said, with a shrug. She didn't have much experience, though. "Do you think it's possible that he knew earlier and just didn't say anything to save your feelings? Or do you think it was more...I don't want to say "malicious" but...planned?"

The Andorian thought for a moment. "I don't think he planned to hurt me. I just think that he made the decision a while back and was looking for a way to tell me. He's just not very good at confrontation. He hasn't been since we met.

"I know I'll survive this. Don't humans have that saying that whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger?"

She chuckled. "Yes, they do. My father has said as much to me," she said. "But even if it does make you stronger, try not to let it make you bitter," she said. "There are, as the humans are also fond of saying, plenty of fish in the sea. It means that there are more people; the Universe is large and as we explore more and more, we're discovering more and more races. You probably will meet your perfect man who treats you well brings you flowers for no reason, and puts a blanket over you when you fall asleep on the couch. BUT...not yet. And that's OK. We're still young," she said. "VERY few of us will meet our spouses here, or even at our first postings," she said. "Both of my parents dated other people before they met. My mother very nearly married her boyfriend back on Bajor," she said. "I am glad she didn't- I wouldn't be here today!" She said. "I only say that to illustrate that while it hurts like hell TODAY, in five years' time, Jason will just be a memory," she said.

"I suppose you're right," Ren said as he sat up ever so slightly straighter, his antennae twitching back and forth. 'But I'm kind of a strange guy I guess. I'm not ready to start making wedding plans. I mean even with Jsaon I knew it might end. But I don't want, 'nice shoes let... what I mean is I don't want one-night stands either. I'm just not sure how to keep things in balance."

Noxi nodded. "Well. I think the best way to approach it next time, then, is to just be straightforward. And definitely far more picky. Some men may not be open to hearing you're more into something real and long-term, and that's okay. It just means they're not for you. Plenty of people want real connections. We're young and are supposed to sow our oats, but even the most sensual among us need stability, too!!" She smiled. "I have found that the old idea that ALL men just want to have sex all the time isn't true. Some do, of course, but a lot just want someone to have a good time with, and talk to. Regular things." She explained.

"I'll try that, thanks. And thanks for your help. I think I'm okay for now. But, I can see you again if I need to right? I like talking with you. If you weren't a woman I'd ask you out."

Noxi laughed. "Thank you! But you're not really my type, sorry. I like Vulcans and Romulans," she said. "The logic. The eyebrows!" She laughed again.

"Is there anything else you wish to discuss? If not, feel free. And yes, I am always here to chat. Even just as a friend," she said.

"I don't think I have anything more to say. But, I like the sound of friends and I'll keep my eye out for any cute, straight Vulcanoids."


Cadet Senior Grade Noxi Harrison
Chief Counselor
USS Stardancer

&

Cadet Senior Grade Ren ch'Shaorhs
Chief Flight Control
USS Stardancer

 

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